Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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