Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
