Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
