I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize