On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize