Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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