it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
