Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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