Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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