This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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