That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize