dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Let's get the cat blown out
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
