Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize