Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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