Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
