Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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