remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
