The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
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After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
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He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him