So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
