I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
