Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
