Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize