yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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