That's intense
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
