Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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