Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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