it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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