thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
