guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
