I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
