If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
