thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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