And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
