you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
that's an acceptable place to lick
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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