We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Randomize