Is it normal to miss your booty call?
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize