I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize