when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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