Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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