ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Text me some of your sweat
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
