i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
