week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
