Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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