at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
