i jhust puked up my retainher.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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