I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
