I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
