If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
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do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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