so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
sex in a hospital.. check
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
