I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
