this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
